Tuesday, September 17, 2019
Reflection Updates

Not the post I wanted to do

I was supposed to write an announcement post in about three weeks. It was going to be super fun and happy. I was going to include some pictures, maybe some goofy things I’ve said and done.
Instead, I’m writing this post early. And it’s not happy. I might put one picture in and don’t think I can bear to really say all the goofy things I’ve said and done.
February 4, 2019
Bill and I go to a pregnancy center that does free ultrasounds. The main reason we went there was because there would be too many hoops to jump through to do it at the hospital. Our reason for doing it was for peace of mind. I thought I would be about 8 weeks pregnant at the time. The ultrasound showed me at just over 5 weeks. We also got to see the heartbeat! Baby was too little to hear it, but it was visible on the ultrasound.
Okay, that’s fine. I was a little off on the time, no big deal. We scheduled another ultrasound for February 21st to check on how things were going.
My pregnancy symptoms were definitely stronger than the last time and that really encouraged me.
February 16
We arrived at my family’s house and told them. Everyone was super excited as we expected. We talked about babies and lots of baby-related things the whole weekend.

February 18

On our “way” home, we stopped at Bill’s parent’s house and told the family that was there. That night, we called everyone else. Again, everyone was excited, especially since our baby would make three cousins in 6 months.

February 21

We went in for our ultrasound and the RN couldn’t find a heartbeat. We were devastated. The two workers at the pregnancy center prayed for us before we left and we headed home. Half an hour later, I was in a lot of pain. I had never felt such excruciating pain. I do not like hospitals or doctors, and especially not Emergency Rooms. But when Bill asked if we should go, I said yes.I won’t go into all the details of frustration and waiting and everything that happened in the ER. Suffice it to say that we were there for just over 5 hours and the Physician’s Assistant confirmed I was miscarrying.

February 25

Today I finally got some work done. A little bit of writing for my blog, including this post. I don’t know when I’ll have the heart to put it up on the blog, but at least it is written now. Bill and I are still grieving, but trying to move on. It’s hard.

If you don’t mind praying, please pray that we can find some answers that will help us keep any other babies God may bless us with. Thank you for reading and understanding if I’m a bit slow about responding to any comments on here.

Faith Blum
<p>I am Faith Blum, author of over 25 books. Most of them are Christian Historical Fiction. I am a small-town Wisconsin girl. I have lived in, or outside of, small towns my whole life. The thought of living in a city with more than 60,000 people in it scares me, especially after some interesting adventures driving through big cities like Minneapolis and St. Paul, Minnesota.</p> <p>I currently reside in the middle of the state of Wisconsin with my husband and our cat, Smokey. I am blessed to be able to have writing as my full-time career with household work and cooking to do on the side. I am also teaching Writing Lessons, doing writing consulting, and am slowly building a Young Living Essential Oils business.</p>
https://www.faithblum.com

50 thoughts on “Not the post I wanted to do

  1. LIfting you up in prayer. I have also had a miscarriage and understand the pain you are feeling.
    I am so very sorry.
    As an author myself, I want to encourage you to take your time. Journal as much as you can to let your heart heal.
    I am praying that God covers you and your husband with His Grace as you mourn.

  2. I’m so sorry, Faith. May God bring you and your family a sense of peace and comfort and may He reveal Himself to you through this difficult time. Praying for you.

  3. I am so so sorry. When God gives you a baby to keep you will be an excellent mother. I know your love for children and that you will bring them up to know and love the Lord. That k you for teaching the Good News with me. I am praying.

  4. Faith,

    I’m so sorry to hear this. I can’t imagine what you and Bill are going through right now and how hard it is to deal with the loss of your child and your hopes for their future. I am praying that God stands near you during this time of suffering.

  5. I’m so deeply sorry, Faith. I know that doesn’t even come close to covering what you’re feeling. I will be praying for you both and that you can find some answers. The not knowing is so hard!

  6. Hello Faith,

    My heart sank when I heard about this. Julida and I have been praying for you and Bill and will continue to until you have a healthy baby in your arms.

  7. Oh Faith, my heart goes out to you and Bill. I have never miscarried, but have taken care of plenty who have. It is hard and tough to loose a little one that we want so much. Their are hopes and dreams that were attached already. I am sure things are a bit of a fog, but take it one step at a time. Think it is great you are both working this out together. Praying for you all.

  8. Faith, I don’t even have words to say right now. This makes all the little troubles in my life feel so petty. I just wanted to tell you I’m praying for you and your husband and that I wish there was something I could say to help you through this. ❤️

  9. Have faith, Faith. I lost my first baby, too. If there is something wrong, it’s best to miscarry they say. I went on to have three healthy babies. God bless, chin up, the next one will be perfect.

  10. Praying for you. I’m sure it’s really rough. My mom has had several early miscarriages, and it was heartbreaking each time. Praying for comfort and healing. Your precious little one is safe with Jesus, but I know that doesn’t help much right now… *Hugs*

  11. Aw, my heart is breaking for you two! God may not answer all your questions, but you know he will love you through this time! Praying for all facets of yours and your husband’s healing! Praying for your marriage, family, loved ones too!

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