If you spend any kind of time in church, you have probably heard a lot about fear. “God says ‘Fear not!’ x amount of times in the Bible!” pastors preach from the pulpit. We’re all very familiar with the stories of Gideon and how his lack of faith and fear that have, in modern times, branded him a coward.

Though an host should encamp against me, my heart shall not fear: though war should rise against me, in this will I be confident. – Psalm 27:3

We have memorized all the verses, learned all the platitudes.

Yet somehow saying is always easier than doing, right?

What is Fear?

noun

noun: fear; plural noun: fears

1. 1.

   an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.

   “he is prey to irrational fears”

   synonyms:

   terror, fright, fearfulness, horror, alarm, panic, agitation, trepidation, dread, consternation, dismay, distress; More

   antonyms:

   calmness, confidence

   • a feeling of anxiety concerning the outcome of something or the safety and well-being of someone.

     “police launched a search for the family amid fears for their safety”
   • the likelihood of something unwelcome happening.

     “she could observe the other guests without too much fear of attracting attention”

     synonyms:

     likelihood, likeliness, prospect, possibility, chance, odds, probability, expectation, conceivability, feasibility, plausibility; More

   • ARCHAIC

     a mixed feeling of dread and reverence.

     “the love and fear of God”

     synonyms:

     awe, wonder, wonderment, amazement; More

     antonyms:

     indifference

verb

verb: fear; 3rd person present: fears; past tense: feared; past participle: feared; gerund or present participle: fearing

1. 1.

   be afraid of (someone or something) as likely to be dangerous, painful, or threatening.

   “farmers fear that they will lose business”

   synonyms:

   be afraid of, be fearful of, be scared of, be apprehensive of, dread, live in fear of, go in terror of, be terrified of, be terrified by, cower before, tremble before, cringe from, shrink from, flinch from; More

   • feel anxiety or apprehension on behalf of.

     “I fear for the city with this madman let loose in it”

     synonyms:

     worry about, feel anxious/concerned about, have anxieties about, have qualms about, feel disquiet for, be solicitous for “they all feared for his health”

   • avoid or put off doing something because one is afraid.

     “they aim to make war so horrific that potential aggressors will fear to resort to it”

     synonyms:

     be too afraid, be too scared, be too apprehensive, hesitate; More

   • used to express regret or apology.

     “I’ll buy her book, though not, I fear, the hardback version”
   • ARCHAIC

     regard (God) with reverence and awe.

     synonyms:

     stand in awe of, regard with awe, revere, reverence, venerate, respect; More

One of my favorite quotes has always been this:

Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something is more important than fear.

It’s credited to a bunch of different people, but the point stands. xD

Some of the greatest seasons of life are riddled with fear. Moving away. Getting married. Starting at a new school or college. And in the time of change, it’s really hard to see the light on the other side of the tunnel.

Sometimes doing God’s will feels like running head-first toward a cliff and preparing to jump off.

Here’s an excerpt from my book, Waterfalls: Navigating Life Changes God’s Way:

The latter half of 2018 was a really hard time. I was struggling with a big life change coming up – furlough. The nasty “f” word. If you’re a missionary kid, you know exactly how this feels.

This furlough was different, though.

This time, I was leaving permanently. Staying “home” in the U.S. was something that had been impressed on my mind for months at that point. I had not a doubt in my mind that God wanted me to move back to my passport country.

… that didn’t mean it was easy.

I found myself having really bad spells – panic attacks, I guess? I’m not sure how to really explain them. I would be doing something normal – working, studying for my classes in the Bible Institute – and all of a sudden my thoughts would turn to the future. Without fail, my throat would close up, tears would start pouring, and I’d find myself panicking, looking for any way to get out somewhere alone. Once I finally did find a place alone, it was all I could do to curl up in a fetal position and cry.

Coworkers – you’ll probably never read this, but I apologize for those last few months. I know I was really hard to work with and terrible at communicating everything that was going on.

Family – who will most definitely read this – maybe don’t ask me about this in person. I can guarantee I will cry. No one wants to see that.

The point I’m getting to is this – life changes are scary. Especially when you don’t know the details of what will happen on the other side of the big life change. It’s so easy to get stuck inside your own head, bashing and screaming and pounding at the doors of your brain. It’s so easily to get mired in the sloughs of grief {because even if you’re not necessarily grieving the change that’s coming, you’re still grieving the loss of life as you know it}.

It’s really hard to trust God and believe that there’s something on the other side of the cliff. It’s high and the wind’s lashing at you and you’re scrambling to hold on to the face of the rock by your fingernails. And it’s not like it’s making any difference – God wants you flying off that cliff, you’re going to fly.

But believe it or not {cheesy as it sounds} God gave us wings. He’s just trying to get us to use them. He doesn’t want us sliding down the mountain on our butts if we could be flying, you know?

But we’re stubborn humans, and we’re scared to trust in something that we can’t see. So God’s like, “Okay, you little brat. Time to jump.”

And off the cliff we go. And it’s terrifying. It feels like life is tearing your soul out of you as you fall. It feels like you’re going to crash into the rocks at the bottom of the cliff.

But man does God make a good set of wings. It hurts to death to spread them for the first time, but He made them in prime condition. Things start to get better. He sends little gifts all along the journey to remind you that He’s got this, and He’s not going to let you slam into another mountain. He’s the gust of wind holding you up and you can rest 100% sure that He’s not going to let you fall.

Believe it or not, there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

There are people to support you through this.

There is a God who has your back no matter what goes wrong.

About the Author

As a daughter of missionaries, Rebekah DeVall spent her childhood in the tropical rainforests and mountain regions of Bolivia, South America. Easily relating to many cultures, she writes stories that span cross-cultural journeys – between capabilities {When Your Melody Fades}, classes {Aveza of the Ercanhelm}, and life vs. death {Death’s Mirror}.

Recently returned stateside, Rebekah is still searching for God’s will for her life, whether it be fiction or nonfiction, food services or prison ministries, in Bolivia or the U.S.A… there’s no place she wouldn’t go if the Lord sends her there.

Links:
Blog: http://www.flashfloodtypist.wordpress.com
IG: https://www.instagram.com/rebekahdevall/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/flashfloodtypist